MEN!

ARRRRGH!!!

Sorry. Just needed to scream and let some frustration out!

Why is it, that just when you think things may finally be working out for you, that someone decides to go and pull the rug out from under your feet?

I'm talking of course about a man. And true to form, I'm not naming names. Some may be able to work it out regardless. But this is my rant, not yours, so pleased don't make any disrespectful comments toward him as you'll never know all the 'ins and outs' of it, and I'm not going to bore you with that much detail! The image is in no way representational of him, its a generalisation of those that have no awareness of how they treat others.

I am however going to let it be known that I really resent the past. Not history, but our own individual pasts. The parts of it that teach us lessons, good or bad, but mainly the pieces of it that subconciously teaches us to be afraid of letting go and risking everything. I resent people who hurt others and make sure its almost impossible for the rest of us to get through the years of barriers created by emotional abuse and the wreckage the abusers leave behind.

Its unfair, we shouldn't have to do it. I'm not saying that I'm baggage free, that would be an outright lie. And its not that I'm not prepared to be with someone who has baggage either. We all have it, and if you love a person, you take them warts and all, I'm more than ready for that. Things have now been said that can't be taken back, and we shouldn't have to. They're valid wants, needs and concerns from both parties.

But the parts I resent above all others are the parts the make the initial barrier so high that's it damn near impossible to scale.

Well, if Hilary can scale Everest, I can scale this! I'm not giving up on him, I just hope he hasn't given up on me!