Open

Well, its finally happened. After 8 heart breaking, soul searching, desperately lonely months, its here. No alarm bells, no sirens, no fireworks. Just the sudden awareness of the relationship between my ego and my id.

Actually, it never went, it was just hiding. In a dark place somewhere. Cold, damp and miserable. No, I'm not talking about Spring or anything, but I did choose my metaphors wisely I believe.

I'm talking about my heart.

After all that time of being in those places, trying to kid myself that things were getting better, trying to date and having no success. Its back.

I say my heart, but what I'm really talking about is the thing it does. You see, no matter how much, or how many times it gets hurt, it fights back. I may suffer from depression, and sometimes it can be all consuming, but the two things my heart never truly gives up on are hope and love.

And its ready to be consumed. Or rather I am. After all this time, I'm finally an open door (thanks Doris!) again. Ready for someone to walk in, sweep me off my feet, fill me with passion, romance, love and hope!

So I'm hoping its not just sticking its head out and testing the water, because what I really want is to jump in the deep end and swim!