Is He Out There?

I've just read a profile on a rather well known gay website where the owner (of the profile) boldly states that Mr Right, or Mr Perfect, does not exist! It sparked a rather healthy and heated debate between my house-mate and I!

You see. I don't believe he can or does exist. Or at least not the concept of him that we have grown up to expect. And this also goes for Miss Right/Perfect too. (for the record, I'm not being sexist, I'm just going to refer to Mr Right from now on, but its an organic concept, it could be Miss Right I'm talking of too!)

People also talk of 'Mr Right Now'. An even better concept for some people, it allows them the freedom to move from relationship to relationship. Or as I call it, an emotional cop-out! In order for this hypothesis to work, wouldn't the two people concerned have to sit down and discuss that 'Mr Right Now' was all they wanted. And if this was the case, wouldn't there be further implications? Like, if it is 'right now', do timescales have to be involved? Because at some point, surely 'Mr Right Now' has to pass and become 'Mr No Longer'. And what happens, as if invariably is the case, when one partner becomes more involved in the relationship than the other and his 'Mr Right Now' becomes his Mr Right'!

So in my mind, 'Mr Right Now' can't exist. Because sooner or later, emotions will run high and someone will get more than they bargained for, and someone will get less. Hearts will be broken and feelings crushed. No one should have to go through that.

We are all individuals, and as such have individual wants, needs and requirements. How could one perfect being fill ALL of the needs of ALL of the people. Impossible isn't it? Yet I do believe that the one exists out there for all of us!

We just have to recognise that we need to accept all of the things we see in people. Those quirks and foibles that we think are cute, which then become annoying and irksome. They are the things which go a long way to make up some of the initial attraction. Tempers can flare, and arguments will ensue. Little things will make us laugh and cry. A touch, a whisper, a hug, a smile. They should be treasured as no one thing can be the same. Once they pass, they're gone. People should never limit themselves to preconceived ideas about who and what they expect from others! Now I'm not saying that we should all give up our hopes and fantasies, I never would, I have far too many of my own. But prescribed lists of "do's and don'ts" are not the way forward. The only thing they will achieve are broken hearts and trails of disappointments.

People are like jigsaw puzzles. Its all the little pieces that make up the whole picture. But as its people we're talking about, I also have to say there will always be some pieces missing too. But they're not to worry us, because we will never see others as they see themselves.

So what I'm looking for is my own 'Mr Right', only I've decided to call him 'Mr Right For Me'! I know he exists, and I intend to find him.